Hey! Where'd I go?

I'm still alive and well, except for all of the beer and junk food. Just busy holidays. I'll be back in full force after the New Year.

Go Huskers!

TNA Sting

Here's a recent picture of Sting from TNA Wrestling. Hey, wait a minute. That's not Sting! It's Tony Snow!

'A Christmas Story': Nullified by the state

Here a look at that evil, non-PC movie "A Christmas Story."

Ralphie's mother is a homemaker; father a regular working stiff. Between them they have no repertoire of psychobabble to rub together. Nobody implores Ralphie to express his feelings or abreact, as kids do today. In fact, he is taught restraint and disciplined when naughty. But he sure is not put on Ritalin for daydreaming in class. Nor is he biologically deprogrammed in "life skills and anger-management" classes when he gets into a fistfight. Despite the dearth of therapeutic comfort-speak in his life, Ralphie is a happy little boy – not hallmark happy, but normal happy.

Link: WorldNetDaily: 'A Christmas Story': Nullified by the state

He said / She said

I'm sure you've seen this, but I still think it's funny:

--------------
1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female...... Any part under a car's hood.
Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing football without a cup.

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female.... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male...... A source of entertainment, self-_expression, male bonding.

7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female...... The greatest _expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.

PW Insider's 2005 wrestling nominations

Here's a copy of my nominations for the annual PWInsider.com awards:

Wrestler of the Year - Christian
Tag Team of the Year - MNM
Match of the Year - Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan (SummerSlam)
Announcer of the Year - Mike Tenay
Color Commentator of the Year - Tazz
Hottie of the Year - Trish Stratus
Feud of the Year - AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe
Flyer of the Year - AJ Styles
Brawler of the Year - JBL
Technician of the Year - Kurt Angle
Show of the Year - ECW: One Night Stand
Best Interviews of the Year - Christian
Move of the Year - Petey Williams' Canadian Destroyer flip piledriver
Comeback of the Year - Joey Styles (hope that's counts)
Angle/Storyline of the Year - Shawn Michaels goes heel on Montreal.
Character/Gimmick of the Year - Samoa Joe as "tough guy who doesn't respect the X-Division"
Most Improved Wrestler of the Year - Christian
Newcomer of the Year - Samoa Joe
News Story of the Year - WWE Raw goes back to USA network.
Promotion/Brand of the Year - TNA
Stupidest Thing About Wrestling This Year - WWE "creative" team.

Vice President Cheney misses WWE

So does that mean the VP has good taste or bad taste?

Vice President Dick Cheney recently visited the troops stationed at Bagram Air Field in Afghanistan. While there, Mr. Cheney let it be known that he would have liked to have been there when WWE was there for the Tribute to the Troops show. Here is a sampling of Mr. Cheney's speech:

THE VICE PRESIDENT: Don't hold back. (Laughter.) Well, that's quite a welcome. And Lynne and I are delighted to be here today. And I want to thank you for that fantastic welcome. And, General Eikenberry, for your kind words, and say good afternoon to my fellow Americans. Let me also thank General Sterling and Command Sergeant Major Savusa. It's great to be here today. I have a message from the folks back home: We're proud of you; we're grateful for your service; and we're behind you 100 percent.
It's good to be back at Bagram Air Field, and to express our country's appreciation to every man and woman in Joint Task Force 76. I'm only sorry I didn't come earlier this month. Somebody told me I missed a chance to meet Vince McMahon, Big Show, and Triple H.

Link: WWE.com

Test your 'coolness'

Take the Cool Test

Drunk had twice the lethal alcohol level

Well I think we all have something to shoot for now.

Police said the man had probably been drinking home-made alcohol for several days because of the impossibility of reaching his blood-alcohol level of 0.9 percent in just a day.

Link: Reuters

Eye-to-eye with a giant squid

Giant squid commin' to get ya.

Link: NEWS.com.au - Eye-to-eye with a giant squid

Stalin's half-man, half-ape super-warriors

Well if that's not the coolest story ever, I don't know what is.

The Soviet dictator Josef Stalin ordered the creation of Planet of the Apes-style warriors by crossing humans with apes, according to recently uncovered secret documents.

Link: The Scotsman

Kamala!

Remember Kamala, wrestling fans? Check out his website. And have your sound on so that you can hear him sing.

Yes, I said sing.

Buy Kamala's CD here!

I said the ......WORD

Cartoon time:

And wrestling just gets stupider and stupider

There was a pay-per-view last night. The only thing worth mentioning was the "suicide" of former WWE referee, Tim White.

From PWinsider.com:

Josh Mathews was in the Friendly Tap bar, talking with former WWE referee Tim White, who owns the place. White was drinking like crazy, and not talking, just grabbing his shoulder. Mathews talked about how White injured his shoulder refereeing Chris Jericho vs. Triple H in a Hell In A Cell match in May 2002. They showed the footage of the bump White took (which caused a legitimate injury). White said the Cell ruined his life, and that because of that injury, his wife left him, his friends left him, and he has tons of medical problems now. White, playing a total drunk, said he even got irritable bowel syndrome from the injury. White said he had nothing to live for. Josh tried to lighten the mood by saying "Have a 'White' Christmas'. Tim White pulled out a shotgun, and drunkenly staggered off. Josh, looking off camera, said "Please don't do that Mr. White" and we heard a shotgun blast. From Josh's expression, I guess we are supposed to assume that White killed himself. Michael Cole and Tazz mourned for about ten seconds, then we went to the next match.

World Outrage at "Tookie" Execution

Wow, from Austria to the Vatican, everyone's kind of peeved at the U.S. for the death penalty. I don't really have an opinion on it, but it does get some pretty bad international PR.

RSP-W year end award results

Here's the 16th annual Rec.sport.pro-wrestling awards. I actually remembered to vote this year. I was the only one to give Shelton Benjamin a vote for "most overrated wrestler." Cool!

Oh, and in the Themofabsence.com category for "Guys who just won't give up" you'll note that HACK-MAN still votes and leaves comments for everything. How funny. LOSER!

Link: RSPW Awards

Michael Schiavo needs your help,donations and support

Now if you need me, I'll be in the bathroom throwing up.

Classified Ads

Here's a forward I got. Pretty good.

-----------------------------

The Following Were Actually Taken From Classified Ads In Newspapers:
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 YEARS OLD. HATEFUL LITTLE DOG.

FREE PUPPIES:
1/2 COCKER SPANIEL
1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG

FREE PUPPIES... PART GERMAN SHEPHERD PART STUPID DOG

FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG.
LOOKS LIKE A RAT...
BEEN OUT AWHILE..
BETTER BE REWARD.

1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer

SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...
ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.

2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES:
1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15

TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS OWN 1988 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800

COWS FOR SALE. NEVER BRED CALVES.
ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.

FULL SIZED MATTRESS.
20 YR. WARRANTY.
LIKE NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL.

NORDIC TRACK $300
HARDLY USED, CALL CHUBBY

BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING
'WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS'

HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER
'IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!'

HARRISBURG POSTAL EMPLOYEES GUN CLUB

GEORGIA PEACHES
CALIFORNIA GROWN - 89 cents lb.

NICE PARACHUTE:
NEVER OPENED - USED ONCE

TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.

EXERCISE EQUIPMENT:
QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS & BOX SPRINGS - $175.

OUR SOFA WILL SEAT THE WHOLE MOB.
100% ITALIAN LEATHER.

JOINING NUDIST COLONY!
SELLING WASHER & DRYER $300.

ALZHEIMER'S CENTER PREPARES
FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER

OPEN HOUSE
BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON
FREE COFFEE & DONUTS

AND NOW FOR THE BEST OF THE LOT:
FOR SALE BY OWNER
Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. $1,000.00 negotiable. No longer needed. Recently married; wife knows everything.

Jeff Rense - Racist

Man, I haven't went to rense.com in a long time. I used to go there for UFO and Libertarian stuff. Then they started getting really weird. Totally anti-American, anti-Israel, "Bush planned 9/11," that type of thing. Anyhow, I went to the page tonight and found that they're now in full "deny the holocost" mode. Pretty sick. I know anti-Semitism is the "in" thing now, but come on.

Proof: Go to Rense.com. You'll find eleven links such as this one, Auschwitz Museum Director Reveals 'Gas Chamber' Hoax grouped together under the heading "HOLOCAUST CONTROVERY RAGES."

Trust me, I don't like posting stuff like this, but somebody needs to expose that asshole Rense for what he is and if not me, who?

Giant, 450 lb jellfish invade Japan

Awesome! Um, as long as nobody gets hurt.

They are 6ft wide and weigh 450lb (200kg), with countless poisonous tentacles, they have drifted across the void to terrorise the people of Japan. Vast armadas of the slimy horrors have cut off the country’s food supply. As soon as one is killed more appear to take its place.

Link: Times Online

Dr. Crain's UFO Claims Raise Questions

Here's a wacky UFO story:

Burisch says he worked in an underground lab at S-4 near Area 51, the same place first made public by Bob Lazar. Inside he met an extraterrestrial named Jrod and they became pals. He also met angels in the lab and they spoke in Hebrew.

What did Bob Lazar himself have to say about it?

Lazar: ""This is the biggest bullshit story I have ever heard in my life. Anybody that actually believes this guy should be ashamed of themselves. I never worked at Tonopah. I never met this knucklehead"

Ok then.

Link: KLASTV.com

Dean: US Won't Win in Iraq

Come on. It's perfectly alright to debate whether or not going into Iraq was the right thing to do. It's also fine to debate whether or not we're fighting the war on terror (include in Iraq) the right way. Predicting failure (such as the current Democratic leadership now does on a regular basis) is not perfectly alright and will not help anyone, especially the DNC.

Of course Dean could just take Kerry's lead and start accusing U.S. troops of murder and rape.

Link: Dean's blunders

Link: Kerry's insight

The best bible quote ever!

When God saves His people: Zech. 10:7 "their hearts shall be glad as with wine."

I know I like it when my heart is glad as with wine.

Click here for a page full of bible drinking quotes.

Ric Flair's nightmare contines...

Apparently he also owes a million in back taxes. This is too much :(

Charlotte Observer

Divorce Papers Allege Violence In Ric Flair's Marriage

This is very unsettling.

Link: WSOCTV.com